How to be a Hot Momma!

By: Alexandra Holmes

I don't know about you but it wasn't all that long ago that I was childless and so confident that I was hot that it was probably annoying to most. I didn't need anyone to reassure me, whether others agreed or not I felt HOT! Then fast forward three years and when I looked in the mirror I didn't recognize the person looking back at me.I justified my new softer, rounder, larger look by saying "I just had triplets, don't be so hard on yourself".

This worked for awhile until I realized that my triplets were about to celebrate their second birthday and I was still referring to my extra poundage as "baby weight". Now don't get me wrong, I believe that you should love yourself at any size and that beauty starts on the inside but this was more than that. I couldn't be happy with the person I saw in the mirror because I knew I wasn't taking care of myself as much as I should and that I was hurting my self esteem. I didn't want to avoid the mirror and not feel good about myself forever just because I was in the "mom" role now and married and I didn't need to be hot anymore.

Above all of my vanity issues was the fact that I want to raise active, healthy boys and instill good healthy habits in them from very early on. I was eating ice cream or dessert with every meal, eating salty snacks, fast food, soda, and other junk and I didn't do anything active except walk from the recliner to the kitchen. I decided that I didn't want to raise my kids like that. I want to be able to take my kids on vacations and go mountain biking, hiking, surfing, or whatever else seems fun and exciting.

I always tell other people when I am offering advice "If you don't like your situation then instead of whining about just FIX IT". So that's what I am doing, as of November 19th 2011 I have been on a ME journey, a journey to feel better about myself and start my boys down a healthy path in life. I was ready to be a HOT MOMMA!

First of all let me clarify what I mean by "hot momma", this isn't a specific size, shape, color, or look. This means that you are confident in your own skin and feel great about yourself inside and out. I am still 20 pounds from where I ideally want to end up but I am feeling Über confident, energetic, happy and I am having more fun in life.

It will take you making a personal decision to make a change, and no one can force you to do it. I am still on my journey and I hope to be on it forever, constantly striving to improve myself for me and ultimately for my kids. Every change I make has made me happier, more confident, and overall I just feel BETTER.

So below is what I have found successful for becoming a hot momma and I hope it will work for you if that's what you want.

1. Set a Goal: What do you want to gain from this? Do you want to lose weight or maybe gain some weight? Do you want to have more energy or accomplish a specific activity like running a race, or completing an aerobics class without stopping? Whatever it is, you need to identify it, commit to it, and don't cheat yourself by setting an overly easy goal, the quick wins are a separate task. My goal was to lose 40 pounds and run a 5k. (I lost the 40 lbs. and completed the Fort Worth Cowtown 5k!) My new goal is to lose 20 more pounds and have "guns" ;)

2. Find your Driving Force: It is going to take some fuel to get you through the tough spots so you need to figure out what it is that drives you and inspires you. My driving force is knowing that the better I feel about myself the more that I have to give to my kids. When I am not fretting about how I look or how other people see me I can focus on enjoying my boys and I'm able to keep up with them.

3. Make a Plan: This is simple, how are you going to do it? Are you joining a gym or a diet program? Maybe you and a group of friends start walking together or you start practicing for your race. I got the AWESOME gift of four weeks at a diet program from my step-mom. It was one of the best things that could have happened at the time and it was a major kick start.

4. Be Confident!: I know, I know, I know, Alex, isn't that the point of this whole thing? Have you ever heard the term "Fake it 'til you feel it"? You need to do that here...the thing that is the most attractive in a woman is confidence and you may not be there on day one of your juice diet (or whatever it is). That's when you have to fake it 'til you feel it. Pick something that you like and praise yourself for it. This is you to your mirror "Hey hottie, your legs look great in those shorts and you are going to ROCK your day today!". Before you know it you really will feel confident and you will feel like your not just getting dressed to go to work but you are getting ready to WORK IT!!

5. Focus on You: If you’re like me you have heard this before and read it in parenting magazines but still don't do it. It is easy to get caught up in the day to day task of juggling kids, husband, work, life, friends, groceries, laundry, dogs, etc. This is not a new thing but I am going to say it again and hopefully drill it into your brain...If you don't take care of yourself mentally and physically then eventually you will not have anything to give to other people. Take a bath, read a magazine (or my blog!), take care of yourself by coming up with a feel good beauty routine, and do something nice for yourself often. It doesn't have to be expensive, my monthly special girly treat is my Birchbox, I pay $10 a month for a cute box of fancy personalized beauty samples.

6. Quick Wins: Some things take time...too much time it feels like. That is why you need to give yourself quick wins to keep yourself motivated and positive. Example: Today I am going to drink a gallon of water, or this week I will go to the gym twice. These types of things are easy and have quick payoff and will keep you on track for your long term goal.

Hot, funny, and Mom to twin boys! Julie Bown from Modern Family

These things are just part of it and they are just tips that I have found successful. You will work out your own way to success once you are ready but I hope this helps kick start your journey.

Thanks for Reading,

--Alex